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Dave Barry
:: How do you tell when you run o...
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"How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?" -
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Dave Barry
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God
,
Stupidity
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Top 5 quotes from Dave Barry
"[There is] a breed of fashion models … who weigh no more than an abridged dictionary."
"Software: These programs give instruction to the CPU, which processes billions of tiny facts called bytes, and within a fraction of a second it sends you an error message that requires you to call the customer-support hot line and be placed on hold for approximately the life-span of a caribou."
"Hardware: This is the part of the computer that stops working when you spill beer on it."
"The moving cursor writes, and having written, blinks on."
"And now, the Superstore - unequaled in size, unmatched in variety, unrivaled inconvenience."
Top 5 quotes from God, Stupidity
"Always be a little kinder than necessary."
"Happiness sneaks through a door you didn't know that you left open."
"Laughter is the closest thing to the grace of God."
"The distinction between children and adults, while probably useful for some purposes, is at bottom a specious one, I feel. There are only individual egos, crazy for love."
"If you have made a mistake, cut your losses as quickly as possible."
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