Famous Quotes on Stupidity

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Quote	Author	Rating	Rate
"John has been absent because he had two teeth taken out of his face."	Dave Barry
"Please excuse Jennifer for missing school yesterday. We forgot to get the Sunday paper off the porch, and when we found it Monday, we thought it was Sunday."	Dave Barry
"Please excuse Mary. She is having problems with her ovals."	Dave Barry
"Please excuse Fred Friday from school. He has very loose vowels."	Dave Barry
"Fred was absent yesterday because he was playing football. He was hit in the growing area."	Dave Barry
"Please excuse Mary from being absent yesterday. She was in bed with gramps."	Dave Barry
"Please excuse Fred from P.E. for a few days. He fell yesterday out of a tree and misplaced his hip."	Dave Barry
"Please ackuse Fred being absent on Jan. 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, and 33."	Dave Barry
"My son is under the doctor's care and should not take fizical ed. Please execute him."	Dave Barry
"Murphy's golden rule: Whoever has the gold, makes the rules."	Dave Barry
"Too many rocks in the mountains."	Dave Barry
"The places where trails do not exist are not well marked."	Dave Barry
"Reflectors need to be placed on trees every 50 feet so people can hike at night with flashlights."	Dave Barry
"The coyotes made too much noise last night and kept me awake. Please eradicate these annoying animals."	Dave Barry
"Chair lifts need to be in some places so that we can get to wonderful views without having to hike to them."	Dave Barry
"Too many bugs and leeches and spiders and spiderwebs. Please spray the wilderness to rid the area of these pests."	Dave Barry
"Trails need to be reconstructed. Please avoid building trails that go uphill."	Dave Barry
"Found a smoldering cigarette left by a horse."	Dave Barry
"Ban walking sticks in wilderness. Hikers that use walking sticks are more likely to chase animals."	Dave Barry
"Trails need to be wider so people can walk while holding hands."	Dave Barry
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Browse Stupidity quotes by Author:

Abraham Lincoln	Abraham Maslow	Albert Einstein
Alexandre Dumas	Ambrose Bierce	Baron de la Brede et de Montesquieu
Benjamin Franklin	Benjamin "Dizzy" Disraeli	Bernard Berenson
Bertrand Russell	Bill Cosby	Bokonon
Charles Caleb Colton	Charles De Gaulle	Charles J. C. Lyall
Clarence Seward Darrow	Confucius	Dave Barry
Dennis Miller	Doris Fleeson	Dorothy Parker
Douglas Adams	Dwight David Eisenhower	Edwin H. Land
Elbert Hubbard	Epictetus	Erma Louise Bombeck
Fran Lebowitz	Frank Leahy	Gamal Abdel Nasser
General Charles De Gaulle	George Bernard Shaw	George Carlin
Groucho Marx	Gustave Flaubert	Harlan Ellison
Henny Youngman	Henry Ford	Henry Graham Greene
Homer Simpson	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]	Jean de LaBruyere
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe	John F. Kennedy	John Knowles
John Stuart Mill	Jon Bentley	J(ames) William Fulbright
Kahlil Gibran	Katharine Houghton Hepburn	Lee C. Bollinger
Lord Billingsley	Marcus Tullius Cicero	Martin Luther King, Jr.
Maxim Gorky	Mike Tyson	Napolean Bonaparte
Nick Diamos	Oscar Wilde	Ralph Waldo Emerson
Rick Moranis	Rodney Dangerfield	Simone de Beauvoir
Sir Arthur Conan Doyle	Stephen King	Tom Clancy
Vartan Gregorian	Vladimir Vladimirovich Nabokov	W. Somerset Maugham
Will Rogers	William Wister Haines	Woody Allen
Yogi Berra	Æschylus