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:: Stupidity
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"© Copywrong 1995 - All rights reversed."
Homer Simpson
"What was that number for 911 again?"
Homer Simpson
"Oh my god! Space Aliens!!! Don't eat me, I have a wife and kids... EAT THEM!!!"
Homer Simpson
"Lisa, you're my greatest accomplishment and you did it all by yourself."
Homer Simpson
"Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals. Except the weasel."
Homer Simpson
"The older a man gets, the farther he had to walk to school as a boy."
Douglas Adams
"A day without sunshine is like night."
Douglas Adams
"One way to stop a runaway horse is to bet on him."
Douglas Adams
"A hole had just appeared in the Galaxy. It was exactly a nothingth of a second long, a nothingth of an inch wide, and quite a lot of million light years from end to end. As it closed up [...] Two hundred and thirty-nine thousand lightly fried eggs fell out of it...materializing in a large woobly heap on the famine-struck land of Poghril in the Pansel system. The whole Poghril tribe had died out from famine except for one last man who died of cholesterol poisoning some weeks later."
Douglas Adams
"People can have the Model T in any colour - so long as it's black."
Henry Ford
"Twice: Once too often."
Ambrose Bierce
"Can I ask a rhetorical question? Well, can I?"
Ambrose Bierce
"Liberty, n: One of imaginations most precious possessions."
Ambrose Bierce
"Laughter, n. An interior convulsion, producing a distortion of the features and accompanied by inarticulate noises. It is infectious and, though intermittent, incurable."
Ambrose Bierce
"Circus, n: A place where horses, ponies and elephants are permitted to so men, women and children acting the fool."
Ambrose Bierce
"Selfish, adj: Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others."
Ambrose Bierce
"Apologize: To lay the foundation for a future offense."
Ambrose Bierce
"Too many piglets not enough tits."
Abraham Lincoln
"How can I believe in God when just last week I got my tongue caught in the roller of an electric typewriter?"
Woody Allen
"If you take a frown and turn it upside down, the person you are holding by the ankles will soon pass out."
Woody Allen
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