Famous Quotes on Humor

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Quote	Author	Rating	Rate
"Perhaps the mission of those who love mankind is to make people laugh at the truth, to make truth laugh, because the only truth lies in learning to free ourselves from insane passion for the truth."	Umberto Eco
"Please tell me you're Republicans."	Ronald Reagan
"Protect me from knowing what I don't need to know. Protect me from even knowing that there are things to know that I don't know. Protect me from knowing that I decided not to know about the things that I decided not to know about. Amen."	Douglas Adams
"Ridicule is generally made use of to laugh men out of virtue and good sense, by attacking everything praiseworthy in human life."	Joseph Addison
"Righteous people have no sense of humor."	Bertolt Brecht
"Righteous people have no sense of humor."	Bertolt Brecht
"Separated lovers cheat absence by a thousand fancies which have their own reality. They are prevented from seeing one another and they cannot write; nevertheless they find countless mysterious ways of corresponding, by sending each other the song of birds, the scent of flowers, the laughter of children, the light of the sun, the sighing of the wind, and the gleam of the stars-all the beauties of creation."	Victor Hugo
"She has become the Julia Child of sex."	Gloria Steinem
"She's got to learn to reconcile herself to being Mrs Aristotle Onassis because the only place she'll find sympathy from now on is in the dictionary between shit and syphilis."	Aristotle
"She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success wrong by wrong."	Mae West
"Silence will not betray your thoughts but the expression on your face will. Humor has a hundred faces; tragedy only a few."	H. G. Mendelson
"Since I came to the White House I got two hearing aids, a colon operation, skin cancer, a prostate operation and I was shot. The damn thing is, I've never felt better in my life."	Ronald Reagan
"So many tangles in life are ultimately hopeless that we have no appropriate sword other than laughter."	Gordon William Allport
"Some people are so dry that you might soak them in a joke for a month and it would not get through their skins."	Henry Ward Beecher
"That family glaze of common references, jokes, events, calamities-that sense of a family being like a kitchen midden: layer upon layer of the things daily life is made of. The edifice that lovers build is by comparison delicate and one-dimensional."	Laurie E. Colwin
"The chicken came first - God would look silly sitting on an egg."	Author Unknown
"The definition of success--To laugh much; to win respect of intelligent persons and the affections of children; to earn the approbation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to give one's self; to leave the world a little better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch, or a redeemed social condition.; to have played and laughed with enthusiasm, and sung with exultation; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived--this is to have succeeded."	Ralph Waldo Emerson
"The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents, and the second half by our children. If you lose the power to laugh, you lose the power to think."	Clarence Seward Darrow
"The gods too are fond of a joke."	Aristotle
"The humorous man recognizes that absolute purity, absolute justice, absolute logic and perfection are beyond human achievement and that men have been able to live happily for thousands of years in a state of genial frailty."	(Justin) Brooks Atkinson
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Abraham Lincoln	Alan Alda	Albert Einstein
Allison Kearney	Amy Grant	Anne Frank
Ann Landers	Anthony Burgess	Aristotle
Arnold H. Glasgow	Author Unknown	Becky Alunan
Bennett Alfred Cerf	Bertolt Brecht	Bill Cosby
Bill Bryson	Bob Newhart	Boy George
B. J. Gupta	Charles De Gaulle	Charles Hendrickson Brower
Clarence Seward Darrow	Clifton Paul Fadiman	Cullen Hightower
Dan Fielding	Dean Koontz	Dick Clark
Dorothy Parker	Douglas Adams	D(avid) H(erbert) Lawrence
Edgar Watson Howe	Edward Albee	Elbert Hubbard
Ellie Katz	Elsa Maxwell	Eric Idle
Erma Louise Bombeck	Ernest Miller Hemingway	Ethel Barrymore
Eugene Lam	Feodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky	Frank A. Clark
Fred Allen	Freeman John Dyson	Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
George	George Burns	George Carlin
George Barrell Cheever	George Gordon	George Gordon Byron
Georg Christopher Lichtenberg	Gilbert Keith Chesterton	Gloria Steinem
Golda Meir	Gordon William Allport	Groucho Marx
Helen Hayes	Henny Youngman	Henry Ward Beecher
Henry Cate, VII	Henry Elliot	Henry Louis Mencken
Henry Miller	Herbert Gardner	Herman Melville
Hilaire Belloc	Homer McLin	H. G. Mendelson
Isaac Asimov	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]	Jean de LaBruyere
Jennifer Jones	Johann Wolfgang von Goethe	John Fitzgerald Kennedy
John Gillespie Magee	John Guarrine	John Kenneth Galbraith
Jonathan Carroll	Joseph Addison	Julius Henry Marx
J. M. Linsner	J. Russel Lynes	Kahlil Gibran
Karl Barth	Katharine Houghton Hepburn	Larry Gelbart
Laurie E. Colwin	Lewis Carroll	Louisa May Alcott
Mae West	Mahatma Gandhi	Martin Luther
Max Beerbohm	Max Forrester Eastman	Maya Angelou
Mel Brooks	Mignon McLaughlin	Miguel de Cervantes
Milton Berle	Napolean Bonaparte	Nicolas Chamfort
Niels Henrik David Bohr	Norman Cousins	Orison Swett Marden
Owen Gleiberman	Patricia Hitchcock	Peter's Almanac
Ralph Waldo Emerson	Rebecca West	Reinhold Niebuhr
Rene Descartes	Richard Milhouse Nixon	Robert
Robert Anson Heinlein	Robert Killinger	Robert Lee Frost
Rodney Dangerfield	Romain Gary	Ronald Reagan
Rupert Brooke	Russell Lynes	Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Samuel S. Janus	Shirley MacLaine	Sinclair Lewis
Sir Francis Bacon	Sir Walter Besant	Sri da Avabhas
Stephen Fry	Sébastien-Roch Nicolas de Chamfort	Terry Cohen
Theodore M. Hesburgh	Umberto Eco	Victor Borge
Victor Hugo	Walter J. Lippmann	William Hazlitt
William Davis	Woody Allen	Wystan Hugh Auden
W(illiam) Somerset Maugham	Zsa Zsa Gabor	(Justin) Brooks Atkinson
(William) Harvey Cox