Famous Quotes on Humor

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Quote	Author	Rating	Rate
"For health and the constant enjoyment of life, give me a keen and ever-present sense of humor; it is the next best thing to an abiding faith in providence."	George Barrell Cheever
"Forgive, O Lord, my little jokes on Thee and I'll forgive Thy great big one on me."	Robert Lee Frost
"From quiet homes and first beginning, Out to the undiscovered ends, There's nothing worth the wear of winning, But laughter and the love of friends."	Hilaire Belloc
"From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it."	Julius Henry Marx
"From your parents you learn love and laughter and how to put one foot before the other. But when books are opened you discover that you have wings."	Helen Hayes
"God laughs, it seems, because God knows how it all turns out in the end."	(William) Harvey Cox
"Happiness? A good cigar, a good meal, a good cigar and a good woman-or a bad woman; it depends on how much happiness you can handle."	George Burns
"Harrison Ford as the President of the United States [in Air Force One] is such a perfect piece of casting that it's once a fantasy and a joke: The joke is how perfect the fantasy is."	Owen Gleiberman
"He and I had an office so tiny that an inch smaller and it would have been adultery."	Dorothy Parker
"He had the sort of face that makes you realize God does have a sense of humor."	Bill Bryson
"He had the sort of face that makes you realize God does have a sense of humor."	Bill Bryson
"He was a cowboy, mister, and he loved the land. He loved it so much he made a woman out of dirt and married her. But when he kissed her, she disintegrated. Later, at the funeral, when the preacher said, 'Dust to dust,' some people laughed, and the cowboy shot them. At his hanging, he told the others, 'I'll be waiting for you in heaven---with a gun.'"	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]
"He who has achieved success has worked well, laughed often and loved much."	Elbert Hubbard
"He who laughs last is generally the last to get the joke."	Terry Cohen
"Here's a good joke to do during an earthquake: Straddle a big crack in the ground, and if it opens wider, go 'Whoa! Whoa!' and flail your arms around, like you're going to fall in."	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]
"Here's a suggestion for a new animal, if some new ones get created or evolve: something that stings you, then laughs at you."	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]
"Housekeeping ain't no joke."	Louisa May Alcott
"How can they tell?"	Dorothy Parker
"How can you be expected to govern a country that has 246 kinds of cheese?"	Charles De Gaulle
"Humor is always based on a modicum of truth. Have you ever heard a joke about a father-in-law?"	Dick Clark
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Abraham Lincoln	Alan Alda	Albert Einstein
Allison Kearney	Amy Grant	Anne Frank
Ann Landers	Anthony Burgess	Aristotle
Arnold H. Glasgow	Author Unknown	Becky Alunan
Bennett Alfred Cerf	Bertolt Brecht	Bill Cosby
Bill Bryson	Bob Newhart	Boy George
B. J. Gupta	Charles De Gaulle	Charles Hendrickson Brower
Clarence Seward Darrow	Clifton Paul Fadiman	Cullen Hightower
Dan Fielding	Dean Koontz	Dick Clark
Dorothy Parker	Douglas Adams	D(avid) H(erbert) Lawrence
Edgar Watson Howe	Edward Albee	Elbert Hubbard
Ellie Katz	Elsa Maxwell	Eric Idle
Erma Louise Bombeck	Ernest Miller Hemingway	Ethel Barrymore
Eugene Lam	Feodor Mikhailovich Dostoyevsky	Frank A. Clark
Fred Allen	Freeman John Dyson	Friedrich Wilhelm Nietzsche
George	George Burns	George Carlin
George Barrell Cheever	George Gordon	George Gordon Byron
Georg Christopher Lichtenberg	Gilbert Keith Chesterton	Gloria Steinem
Golda Meir	Gordon William Allport	Groucho Marx
Helen Hayes	Henny Youngman	Henry Ward Beecher
Henry Cate, VII	Henry Elliot	Henry Louis Mencken
Henry Miller	Herbert Gardner	Herman Melville
Hilaire Belloc	Homer McLin	H. G. Mendelson
Isaac Asimov	Jack Handey [Deep Thoughts]	Jean de LaBruyere
Jennifer Jones	Johann Wolfgang von Goethe	John Fitzgerald Kennedy
John Gillespie Magee	John Guarrine	John Kenneth Galbraith
Jonathan Carroll	Joseph Addison	Julius Henry Marx
J. M. Linsner	J. Russel Lynes	Kahlil Gibran
Karl Barth	Katharine Houghton Hepburn	Larry Gelbart
Laurie E. Colwin	Lewis Carroll	Louisa May Alcott
Mae West	Mahatma Gandhi	Martin Luther
Max Beerbohm	Max Forrester Eastman	Maya Angelou
Mel Brooks	Mignon McLaughlin	Miguel de Cervantes
Milton Berle	Napolean Bonaparte	Nicolas Chamfort
Niels Henrik David Bohr	Norman Cousins	Orison Swett Marden
Owen Gleiberman	Patricia Hitchcock	Peter's Almanac
Ralph Waldo Emerson	Rebecca West	Reinhold Niebuhr
Rene Descartes	Richard Milhouse Nixon	Robert
Robert Anson Heinlein	Robert Killinger	Robert Lee Frost
Rodney Dangerfield	Romain Gary	Ronald Reagan
Rupert Brooke	Russell Lynes	Samuel Taylor Coleridge
Samuel S. Janus	Shirley MacLaine	Sinclair Lewis
Sir Francis Bacon	Sir Walter Besant	Sri da Avabhas
Stephen Fry	Sébastien-Roch Nicolas de Chamfort	Terry Cohen
Theodore M. Hesburgh	Umberto Eco	Victor Borge
Victor Hugo	Walter J. Lippmann	William Hazlitt
William Davis	Woody Allen	Wystan Hugh Auden
W(illiam) Somerset Maugham	Zsa Zsa Gabor	(Justin) Brooks Atkinson
(William) Harvey Cox