Mark Twain

Ranking: 12th
Biography of Mark Twain
Search Mark Twain's quotes

<< Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next >>
Quote	Categories	Rating	Rate
"It was wonderful to find America, but it would have been more wonderful to miss it."	America
"Just the omission of Jane Austen's books alone would make a fairly good library out of a library that hadn't a book in it."	Success, Insults
"Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed..."	Success, Insults
"Life would be infinitely happier if we could only be born at the age of eighty and gradually approach eighteen."	Age
"Man is the only animal that blushes. Or needs to."	Success, Life
"Many people have the reasoning facility, but no one uses it in religious matters."	Fear
"My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one's country, not to its institutions or its office-holders."	Patriotism
"Name the greatest of all inventors. Accident."	Luck
"O Lord our God, help us tear their soldiers to bloody shreds with our shells; help us to cover their smiling fields with the pale forms of their patriot dead; help us to drown the thunder of the guns with the shrieks of their wounded, writhing in pain; help us to lay waste their humble homes with a hurricane of fire; help us to wring the hearts of their unoffending widows with unavailing grief; help us to turn them out roofless with their little children to wander unfriended the wastes of their desolated land in rags and hunger and thirst, sports of the sun flames of summer and the icy winds of winter, broken in spirit, worn with travail, imploring Thee for the refuge of the grave and denied it."	Anti-Religion, War
"October: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks in. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February."	Money
"Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse. He will go to any length for it-risk fortune, character, reputation, life itself."	Sex
"Part of the secret of success in life is to eat what you like and let the food fight it out inside."	Food
"Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed."	Success, Insults
"Say the report is exaggerated."	Love, Death
"Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very;" your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be."	Writing
"Thanksgiving Day, a function which originated in New England two or three centuries ago when those people recognized that they really had something to be thankful for - annually, not oftener - if they had succeeded in exterminating their neighbors, the Indians, during the previous twelve months instead of getting exterminated by their neighbors, the Indians. Thanksgiving Day became a habit, for the reason that in the course of time, as the years drifted on, it was perceived that the exterminating had ceased to be mutual and was all on the white man's side, consequently on the Lord's side; hence it was proper to thank the Lord for it and extend the usual annual compliments."	Holidays
"The best defense against logic is ignorance."	Wisdom
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."	Happiness
"The first half of life consists of the capacity to enjoy without the chance; the last half consists of the chance without the capacity."	Age
"The history of our race, and each individual's experience, are sown thick with evidence that a truth is not hard to kill and that a lie told well is immortal."	Success, Lies
<< Previous 1 2 3 4 5 Next >>

Browse Mark Twain quotes by category:

Age	America	Anger
Animals	Anti-God	Anti-Religion
Books	Change	Comedy
Confidence	Conformity	Courage
Death	Economics	Education
Emotion	Fear	Food
Forgiveness	God	Government
Happiness	Health	Holidays
Honesty	Ignorance	Insults
Joy	Knowledge	Learning
Lies	Life	Love
Luck	Miscellaneous	Money
Patriotism	Prayer	Quotations
Religion	School	Sex
Sleep	Success	Talent
Taxes	Time	War
Wisdom	Work	Writing