Mark Twain

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Biography of Mark Twain
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Quote	Categories	Rating	Rate
"How can we expect another to keep our secret if we have been unable to keep it ourselves?"	Wisdom
"I am different from Washington; I have a higher, grander standard of principle. Washington could not lie. I can lie, but I won't."	Comedy, Honesty
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."	Success, Insults
"I don't know anything about this man. Anyhow, I only know two things about him. One is, he has never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why."	Success, Insults
"I have been studying the traits and dispositions of the "lower animals" (so called) and contrasting them with the traits and dispositions of man. I find the result humiliating to me."	Animals
"I have never taken any exercise except sleeping and resting."	Sleep
"I never let schooling interfere with my education."	Education
"I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes."	God, Taxes
"If true, rarely beautiful. If beautiful, rarely true."	Wisdom
"If you don't know where you're going, any road will get you there."	Wisdom
"In all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane."	Miscellaneous
"In all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane."	Quotations
"In certain trying circumstances, urgent circumstances, desperate circumstances, profanity furnishes a relief denied even to prayer."	Anger
"In the real world, the right thing never happens in the right place and the right time. It is the job of journalists and historians to make it appear that it has."	Quotations
"Is the Archbishop's blessing any more meaningful than the Politician's handshake? They come, they go, with bigger things than us on their minds."	Wisdom
"It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand."	Fear
"It is better to have people think you a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."	Wisdom
"It is curious that physical courage should be so common in the world and moral courage so rare."	Courage
"It is my belief that nearly any invented quotation, played with confidence, stands a good chance to deceive."	Quotations
"It used to take me all vacation to grow a new hide in place of the one they flogged off me during school term."	Economics, School
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Browse Mark Twain quotes by category:

Age	America	Anger
Animals	Anti-God	Anti-Religion
Books	Change	Comedy
Confidence	Conformity	Courage
Death	Economics	Education
Emotion	Fear	Food
Forgiveness	God	Government
Happiness	Health	Holidays
Honesty	Ignorance	Insults
Joy	Knowledge	Learning
Lies	Life	Love
Luck	Miscellaneous	Money
Patriotism	Prayer	Quotations
Religion	School	Sex
Sleep	Success	Talent
Taxes	Time	War
Wisdom	Work	Writing