Mark Twain

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Quote	Categories	Rating	Rate
"The people of those foreign countries are very, very ignorant. They looked curiously at the costumes we had brought from the wilds of America. They observed that we talked loudly at table sometimes. They noticed that we looked out for expenses and got what we conveniently could out of a franc, and wondered where in the mischief we came from. In Paris they just simply opened their eyes and stared when we spoke to them in French! We never did succeed in making those idiots understand their own language."	America
"Say the report is exaggerated."	Love, Death
"We have not the reverent feeling for the rainbow that a savage has, because we know how it is made. We have lost as much as we gained by prying into that matter."	Knowledge
"There is no other life; life itself is only a vision and a dream for nothing exists but space and you. If there was an all-powerful God, he would have made all good, and no bad."	Fear
"Many people have the reasoning facility, but no one uses it in religious matters."	Fear
"Frankenstein took some flesh and bones and blood and made a man out of them; the man ran away and fell to raping and robbing and murdering everywhere, and Frankenstein was horrified and in despair, and said, "I made him, without asking his consent, and it makes me responsible for every crime he commits. I am the criminal, he is innocent." ... [That's exactly] the case of God and man... God made man, without man's consent, and made his nature, too; made it vicious instead of angelic, and then said, "Be angelic, or I will ill punish you and destroy you." But no matter, God is responsible for everything man does, all the same; He can't get around that fact. There is only one Criminal, and it is not man."	Fear
"It ain't the parts of the Bible that I can't understand that bother me, it is the parts that I do understand."	Fear
"We may not pay Satan reverence, for that would be indiscreet, but we can at least respect his talents."	Fear
"Faith is believing something you know ain't true."	Fear
"I don't know anything about this man. Anyhow, I only know two things about him. One is, he has never been in jail, and the other is, I don't know why."	Success, Insults
"Principles have no real force except when one is well-fed."	Success, Insults
"I didn't attend the funeral, but I sent a nice letter saying I approved of it."	Success, Insults
"Let us be thankful for the fools. But for them the rest of us could not succeed..."	Success, Insults
"The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause."	Wisdom
"How can we expect another to keep our secret if we have been unable to keep it ourselves?"	Wisdom
"If you don't know where you're going, any road will get you there."	Wisdom
"If true, rarely beautiful. If beautiful, rarely true."	Wisdom
"Is the Archbishop's blessing any more meaningful than the Politician's handshake? They come, they go, with bigger things than us on their minds."	Wisdom
"It is better to have people think you a fool, than to open your mouth and remove all doubt."	Wisdom
"The unexamined life may not be worth living, but the life too closely examined may not be lived at all."	Wisdom
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Age	America	Anger
Animals	Anti-God	Anti-Religion
Books	Change	Comedy
Confidence	Conformity	Courage
Death	Economics	Education
Emotion	Fear	Food
Forgiveness	God	Government
Happiness	Health	Holidays
Honesty	Ignorance	Insults
Joy	Knowledge	Learning
Lies	Life	Love
Luck	Miscellaneous	Money
Patriotism	Prayer	Quotations
Religion	School	Sex
Sleep	Success	Talent
Taxes	Time	War
Wisdom	Work	Writing