Doug Larson

Ranking: 88th
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Quote	Categories	Rating	Rate
"If the English language made any sense, lackadaisical would have something to do with a shortage of flowers."	Age
"An optimist thinks this is the best of all worlds. A pessimist fears the same may be true."	Fear, Honesty, Truth
"Accomplishing the impossible means only that the boss will add it to your regular duties."	Accomplishment, Achievement, Duty
"There are worse things than getting a call for the wrong number at 4 AM. It could be the right number."	Miscellaneous
"If all the cars in the United States were placed end to end, it would probably be Labor Day Weekend."	America, Time
"If people concentrated on the really important things in life, there'd be a shortage of fishing poles."	Age, Life
"The reason people blame things on previous generations is that there's only one other choice."	Choice
"The cat could very well be man's best friend but would never stoop to admitting it."	Friends, Men
"A lot of people mistake a short memory for a clear conscience."	Memory, Mistakes
"The surprising thing about young fools is how many survive to become old fools."	Age, Men, Sin
"Some of the world's greatest feats were accomplished by people not smart enought to know they were impossible."	Accomplishment, Achievement, Art
"A child is a person who can't understand why someone would give away a perfectly good kitten."	Evil
"More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse."	Age, Art, Change
"Instead of giving a politician the keys to the city, it might be better to change the locks."	Change, Generosity, Politics
"People are living longer than ever before, a phenomenon undoubtedly made necessary by the 30-year mortgage."	Quotations
"The aging process has you firmly in its grasp if you never get the urge to throw a snowball."	Age
"Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog."	God, Computers
"Life expectancy would grow by leaps and bounds if green vegetables smelled as good as bacon."	Food
"Establishing goals is all right if you don't let them deprive you of interesting detours."	Comedy, Goals
"Real elation is when you feel you could touch a star without standing on tiptoe."	Happiness
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Browse Doug Larson quotes by category:

Accomplishment	Achievement	Age
America	Art	Change
Choice	Comedy	Computers
Duty	Evil	Excellence
Fear	Food	Friends
Generosity	Goals	God
Happiness	Hockey	Honesty
Knowledge	Life	Memory
Men	Miscellaneous	Mistakes
Politics	Quotations	Sin
Time	Truth	Wisdom